………..I grew up in a single parent family. The story goes that when I was two years old my parents separated and mum choose to go single all the way. She was hardworking, determined and a self-driven woman, did all she could to put food on the table. O how I love and miss my childhood. Had everything a child of my age needed; went to the best private schools, played with the best toys in town & dressed in good clothes.
Born in a Christian family I was introduced to Sunday school at a tender age. I learnt Bible stories and recited memory verses as well as acted in skits in the local Full Gospel Church.
Well, nobody is a child forever. Time came for me to move to Nairobi after university education, as we call it ‘joining the world’. My first agenda when I got to Nairobi was to get a Bible believing church where I would worship. Remember my foundation had everything Christian inscribed in my little mind. However, I had no idea that lack of a father when growing up would affect how I view God as a father.
As I was looking for a job to survive in Nairobi my pastor preached a powerful sermon on ‘fatherhood’. Having been in this church for only three months I started considering finding another Church-because his sermon was very irrelevant to me. I liked the pastor’s wife though, that made me to give Bishop a second chance. Believe it or not, bishop preached on fatherhood again- four Sundays in a row! Did he know I didn’t have a father? did he know he was about to lose a member? did he know how ‘irrelevant’ his sermon on fatherhood was to me? Thank God he heed to the voice of God because this is the sermon that changed my entire life. It opened my mind to the fatherhood of God. I fervently began to search and discover God- my Father.
God is our father. Because of His ‘bigness’ He has assigned earthly fathers to His children on earth. We have four types of fathers-political fathers, professional fathers, biological and spiritual fathers. Because they are men, sometimes they fail or neglect their responsibility. That doesn’t change the love God has for His Children which is unconditional. He is our help in times of need and to discover yourself and why you are on this planet begins and ends with God.
Women who grow without fathers often suffer low self-esteem and lack of confidence. Because they live in big families and a society that undermines single parents anybody can speak into their lives, say positive or negative things. Without the proper definition of themselves their identity is blurred and confused causing bad attitude and behavior. They also take too long to discover their purpose because they feel they were an accident. Sometimes they lack the courage to go for even things meant for them in life for example inheritance.
They go through rough waters trying to fit in families/society only to realize they never belong there causing more damage to their identity. To make matters worse they have to face persistent stereotyping. Whether they live a chaste life or not “naturally” they are labelled promiscuous, prostitute, loose, husband snatcher etc. People never take them seriously especially in the area of marriage not because they failed but because of their background. It’s all about their fatherless names.
Having grown up in a single family I stand to encourage anyone that with God my father all is possible. When I embraced God as my father I learnt to exclusively rely on Him. He has everything that I need and can answer all your questions.
You have what it takes to be the woman/man you want to be. To marry the man/woman of your dreams and raise beautiful children in a functional family. That said you have everything it takes to fulfill your God given assignment on earth. Remember you are here on earth for a purpose.
The following are the qualities of God my Father. Like me, embrace Him.
- God is the creator and ruler of the universe- God is your creator, has your manual and knows why you were born in a single parent family. Trust Him to take you where you ought to be. With Him all things are possible.
- God is all Loving- I know John 3:16 is a cliché already so let’s go with Zephaniah 3:17 which says “…He will quite you by His love”
- God is all knowing- Before God formed you in your mother’s womb, He knew you so trust Him to provide for you all you need on earth. Jeremiah 1:5
- God is protector. According to Duet 31:6 God is your protector. He will never leave you nor forsake you
- God is a provider-Any good father will provide for his children (Matthew 6:31-31), (Psalm 34:10) God is much more a provider for His children more than the earthly father.
- God teaches and trains his children- God will take you through His school and teach you His ways, correct you when you wade away
In my next article I will tell you how I got confidence to live a victorious life.Things to do, things to avoid…..!